Still waiting.
However, we must be getting close because Amy told me yesterday that she lost her mucus plug...which (in her words) was like a big vagina sneeze. Hmm...I wonder if I should have said gesundheit?
This revelation was one of many signs that we are close. On Saturday (d-day + 1) Amy had the idea that we should go to the pool. In Bloomington! Against my objections we went. Of course, 10 minutes after leaving the safe boundaries of Champaign (and its nice, comfy emergency rooms) Amy started having contractions. At first they were about 14 minutes apart but by the time we reached the pool they were closer to 11.
Well, fast forward a couple of hours (and a broken eardrum, which is another story) we get back into the car and she's contracting at about 6 minutes apart. As you can probably guess, I didn't handle it very well. Amy was sure it was nothing but I was pretty sure we were about to enter sit-com territory where I'm pulled over on I-74 trying to deliver Fudge from the back seat while the kindly farmer runs to get water...
Alas, the contractions subsided. At least for a while. They've made some appearances here and there since then but for now everything is holding steady at Def-Con 3.
And now for a guest blog commentary from Amy:
First. I don't recall any "objections" of going to Normal to swim in the pool (until after your eardrum was broken). Second. I was consistently reassuring you that my contractions were not that serious as I could talk through all of them and at NO time did I tell you that you should call your mom (and doubles partner) to tell them that I was experiencing contractions. Third. I promise that we will not leave Champaign until after the baby gets here if YOU promise not to panic and give me that "look" everytime I tell you I'm having a contraction. Deal?
Deal.
Editors Note: This blog was written with full permission of the "mucus plug" story.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Thoughts from the OB GYN
Well, yesterday was D-Day and it came and went without much news. Apparently Amy is less like an oven and more like a crockpot. Anyway, we spent a good part of the afternoon in the Dr's office where she went through the types of pics and pokes that make me glad I'm a man. Lots of good blog material, though...
I found out that I won't be given scrubs during the delivery. Which is a little bit of a bummer because I always wanted to walk into a room with my hands in the air and say "I'm scrubbed in."
Before one of the appointments, Amy and I had to go the bathroom at the same time and as I customarily do, I said "Race ya!". She never takes me up on it. It's not like I wouldn't give her a head start...
The long white sticks in the box at the OB Gyn's office are NOT suckers.
Amy's working up a bill for me for services rendered as my own personal NICU. Google tells me that Neonatal Unit charges are about a $1,000 a day. Even with a half-price discount we're still talking over $130,000! We're going to settle on just paying off her student loans...
Amy is moving from an "innie" to an "outie". I told her it's like a turkey button and that she's almost done.
Do they make "Zero" Candles for bithday cakes?
I found out that I won't be given scrubs during the delivery. Which is a little bit of a bummer because I always wanted to walk into a room with my hands in the air and say "I'm scrubbed in."
Before one of the appointments, Amy and I had to go the bathroom at the same time and as I customarily do, I said "Race ya!". She never takes me up on it. It's not like I wouldn't give her a head start...
The long white sticks in the box at the OB Gyn's office are NOT suckers.
Amy's working up a bill for me for services rendered as my own personal NICU. Google tells me that Neonatal Unit charges are about a $1,000 a day. Even with a half-price discount we're still talking over $130,000! We're going to settle on just paying off her student loans...
Amy is moving from an "innie" to an "outie". I told her it's like a turkey button and that she's almost done.
Do they make "Zero" Candles for bithday cakes?
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Curiosity rising...
Thoughts of the week:
Apparently, sitting "Indian Style" doesn't exist anymore. Caleb, Amy and I were playing underwater at the pool...trying to tread water and I mentioned trying it this way. After a big blank stare from Caleb, Amy set me straight that it's now called "Criss Cross Applesauce". Harumph. I didn't know that sauces sit.
Also on the extinction list? Red Rover, Red Rover (too many injuries), Dodge Ball with actual red balls (too many injuries) and Lawn Jarts with the pointy tips (too f-ing awesome!)
Fudge has been jiggling around a lot lately but hasn't dropped much. I told Amy that he's doing that thing that kids do in hallways where they put their arms and legs against the side to shimmy up and down.
The other day I did a full pantomime of a hemorrhoid. It involved a lot of face puffing.
It took a while, but I finally messed up and sent an email to a client with an XOXO at the end of it. Sorry Mr. Petersen.
I wonder if when Fudge comes out he'll be tired from the move. I know that when I move I'm always tired.
Speaking of wondering:
What color will Fudge's eyes be?
Will he have a lot of hair?
Will he be funny or will he be serious?
Will he be introverted or extroverted?
What will be the first thing he breaks?
What is the first thing he'll do which makes me say "no!"
When will I be peed on first?
Will he even know what DVD's are?
Will he still be called Fudge in highschool?
Hmm...
Apparently, sitting "Indian Style" doesn't exist anymore. Caleb, Amy and I were playing underwater at the pool...trying to tread water and I mentioned trying it this way. After a big blank stare from Caleb, Amy set me straight that it's now called "Criss Cross Applesauce". Harumph. I didn't know that sauces sit.
Also on the extinction list? Red Rover, Red Rover (too many injuries), Dodge Ball with actual red balls (too many injuries) and Lawn Jarts with the pointy tips (too f-ing awesome!)
Fudge has been jiggling around a lot lately but hasn't dropped much. I told Amy that he's doing that thing that kids do in hallways where they put their arms and legs against the side to shimmy up and down.
The other day I did a full pantomime of a hemorrhoid. It involved a lot of face puffing.
It took a while, but I finally messed up and sent an email to a client with an XOXO at the end of it. Sorry Mr. Petersen.
I wonder if when Fudge comes out he'll be tired from the move. I know that when I move I'm always tired.
Speaking of wondering:
What color will Fudge's eyes be?
Will he have a lot of hair?
Will he be funny or will he be serious?
Will he be introverted or extroverted?
What will be the first thing he breaks?
What is the first thing he'll do which makes me say "no!"
When will I be peed on first?
Will he even know what DVD's are?
Will he still be called Fudge in highschool?
Hmm...
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Random thoughts from the past 8 1/2 months...
A Cesarean Section is now called a Cesarean Birth. Apparently the term C-section diminishes the effort that a woman puts into having a child. This kind of reminded me of the time I went to Petsmart and asked for a choke chain and was lectured that it’s actually called a “pinch collar”.
Speaking of terms…not since my college Spanish class have I been introduced to words that were this foreign to me. Examples:
Baby Term ---- Mark’s Definition
Meconium --- womb poop
Dilation --- hoo-ha opening
Effacement --- head popping out
Nubain --- The “make you feel a bit loopy” drugs
Cervix --- Girl parts
Bloody Show --- Not what you think
Co-Sleeper --- Crib that attaches to the bed (not the person sleeping next to you)
When Amy and I were making a visit to the hospital we saw an interesting sign that said “Midwifery Services”. Amy thought that maybe it should have been “Midwivery Services” which lead to a conversation without a conclusion. Does one become a midwive if one helps two people at the same time? Do you have to have 2 midwifes to have midwivery? Do they only have Midwives in Utah?
In the last couple months of a pregnancy, I seriously think that packing peanuts might work out better than pillows in bed. There are quite a lot of pillows needed to make an 8 month pregnant woman comfortable.
Sympathy Weight is real! I’ve gained 15 pounds in the past few months and while Amy’s cravings have been relatively calm (chicken nuggets, chicken noodle soup, A Panera Panini)…my cravings have gone from Ice Cream to Frozen Yogurt to Flavorice (Flavorices?) and yes…even pickles. The other day I demanded bread and butter pickle slices be put in the cart when we were shopping. Sigh.
When taking a child to a sonogram…it’s probably a good idea to prep them on what they are going to see. Amy and I brought Caleb to the first sonogram and he was convinced that Amy had swallowed a dog (and an alien).
I think we are paying for this pregnancy with urine. Every time Amy and I go to the doctor she has to bring a vial of pee with her. They say that they are doing some kind of test on it but it all seems really suspicious for me.
I’ve learned that while gently touching your partner’s stomach, the thing NOT to say is “Ewww…gross!” when the baby moves. Even if it’s a really startling movement that feels strange…
Labor Emergency Rooms are nicer than every other emergency room.
A Cesarean Section is now called a Cesarean Birth. Apparently the term C-section diminishes the effort that a woman puts into having a child. This kind of reminded me of the time I went to Petsmart and asked for a choke chain and was lectured that it’s actually called a “pinch collar”.
Speaking of terms…not since my college Spanish class have I been introduced to words that were this foreign to me. Examples:
Baby Term ---- Mark’s Definition
Meconium --- womb poop
Dilation --- hoo-ha opening
Effacement --- head popping out
Nubain --- The “make you feel a bit loopy” drugs
Cervix --- Girl parts
Bloody Show --- Not what you think
Co-Sleeper --- Crib that attaches to the bed (not the person sleeping next to you)
When Amy and I were making a visit to the hospital we saw an interesting sign that said “Midwifery Services”. Amy thought that maybe it should have been “Midwivery Services” which lead to a conversation without a conclusion. Does one become a midwive if one helps two people at the same time? Do you have to have 2 midwifes to have midwivery? Do they only have Midwives in Utah?
In the last couple months of a pregnancy, I seriously think that packing peanuts might work out better than pillows in bed. There are quite a lot of pillows needed to make an 8 month pregnant woman comfortable.
Sympathy Weight is real! I’ve gained 15 pounds in the past few months and while Amy’s cravings have been relatively calm (chicken nuggets, chicken noodle soup, A Panera Panini)…my cravings have gone from Ice Cream to Frozen Yogurt to Flavorice (Flavorices?) and yes…even pickles. The other day I demanded bread and butter pickle slices be put in the cart when we were shopping. Sigh.
When taking a child to a sonogram…it’s probably a good idea to prep them on what they are going to see. Amy and I brought Caleb to the first sonogram and he was convinced that Amy had swallowed a dog (and an alien).
I think we are paying for this pregnancy with urine. Every time Amy and I go to the doctor she has to bring a vial of pee with her. They say that they are doing some kind of test on it but it all seems really suspicious for me.
I’ve learned that while gently touching your partner’s stomach, the thing NOT to say is “Ewww…gross!” when the baby moves. Even if it’s a really startling movement that feels strange…
Labor Emergency Rooms are nicer than every other emergency room.
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